[REPORT]
The Smell of Fame
Last week the museum where I work smelled like death. Actually it smelled like several thousand long-stemmed blood-red roses which one of my colleagues told me smelled like the funeral home which froze his dad so that they could wait to have the funeral until Saturday when people weren’t working. His dad died on a Tuesday. The museum smelled like a funeral on a Tuesday too. But he didn’t notice the stench between co-incidences.
Above the blood-red roses rested a twenty-foot gold-ribbed birdcage which was filled with 3 pea-cocks and 1 white pea-hen for celebrities like Lindsey Lohan and Cameron Diaz to gawk at. I wonder if they liked gawking instead of being gawked at. Of course directly in front of the cage was a giant blood-red carpet leading up the main steps which was surrounded by roaring photographers and flashing strobes. It sounded like an ancient ritual – some sort of hedonistic call for medium-rare blood-red meat.
When I helped the light technicians take down the lights in Jennifer Hudson’s “dressing room” which is actually a gallery displaying a panorama of the palace of Versailles near Paris, he told me he had to make the lights “sexy.” He thought that was funny, because he repeated it a few times. Jennifer Hudson has perfect pitch. Although all the flowers kept making me sneeze, I couldn’t help but stare at the spectacle of it all, the surface of things: jarring. The waiters dumped the remaining wine from the wine glasses into a big white plastic crate type thing. There was a lot of blood-redwine sloshing around in the bottom of that crate when they carted it over to kitchen to dump it out. We were allowed to keep the roses and the rosebushes if we wanted. They say that rosebushes especially the big ones that were climbing up accompanying white lattice trellis things are expensive. But they seemed like a hassle to carry home and feed. They got trashed just like everything else.
To read a pretty boring story about what they call the “Party of the Year” click here ; or to read about how the pea-hen escaped her cage click here
The Smell of Fame
Last week the museum where I work smelled like death. Actually it smelled like several thousand long-stemmed blood-red roses which one of my colleagues told me smelled like the funeral home which froze his dad so that they could wait to have the funeral until Saturday when people weren’t working. His dad died on a Tuesday. The museum smelled like a funeral on a Tuesday too. But he didn’t notice the stench between co-incidences.
Above the blood-red roses rested a twenty-foot gold-ribbed birdcage which was filled with 3 pea-cocks and 1 white pea-hen for celebrities like Lindsey Lohan and Cameron Diaz to gawk at. I wonder if they liked gawking instead of being gawked at. Of course directly in front of the cage was a giant blood-red carpet leading up the main steps which was surrounded by roaring photographers and flashing strobes. It sounded like an ancient ritual – some sort of hedonistic call for medium-rare blood-red meat.
When I helped the light technicians take down the lights in Jennifer Hudson’s “dressing room” which is actually a gallery displaying a panorama of the palace of Versailles near Paris, he told me he had to make the lights “sexy.” He thought that was funny, because he repeated it a few times. Jennifer Hudson has perfect pitch. Although all the flowers kept making me sneeze, I couldn’t help but stare at the spectacle of it all, the surface of things: jarring. The waiters dumped the remaining wine from the wine glasses into a big white plastic crate type thing. There was a lot of blood-redwine sloshing around in the bottom of that crate when they carted it over to kitchen to dump it out. We were allowed to keep the roses and the rosebushes if we wanted. They say that rosebushes especially the big ones that were climbing up accompanying white lattice trellis things are expensive. But they seemed like a hassle to carry home and feed. They got trashed just like everything else.
To read a pretty boring story about what they call the “Party of the Year” click here ; or to read about how the pea-hen escaped her cage click here
posted by Darren Byler at 10:55 PM
2 Comments:
hey, thanks for the endorsement of my site a few posts back. it made me a very happy little girl. just so you know, we are fans back. galen especially is a big fan of your blog. maybe because he knows what more of the words mean. i had to look up what "anecdotal" even meant. :)
always like to hear of your life in the big city..
jenny k.
darren. shame on u. being a good mennonite, u didn't rescue any leftover red wine 2 add 2 some tasty homecooked dish? n no autographs from the...peacocks. (*sigh) well. maybe next time. in the meantime, i guess u can keep working on that livingroom light fixture. 4 jennifer of course.
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